For the Love of Jack by Kathie Costos was written to help other families like ours. The hardest part was feeling alone, without hope or understanding. We are not alone. Our loved ones do not suffer alone. Together we can change the way mental illness is looked at in this country and the way we look at each other.

Jack and I started out looking at each other with love. The same love that got us through more tragedy than any family should ever have to face got us through. I watched him change over the years and came so close to giving up on him more times than I want to admit. Understanding PTSD helped me cope with his illness. It helped me to understand that the things he did, the way he acted had nothing to do with me or the world around us. It had to do with the world he left behind in Vietnam. The war was the reason for his suffering, and mine.

Through the years I also understood that it doesn't matter if it was a war or another tragic event. The reasons may be different but living with and coping with mental illness are common ground. It does not have to be terrible although it is hard. It does not have to be the end of a relationship because it can be the beginning of a new kind of one.

I've been doing volunteer outreach work for 25 years now.  I get emails from Vietnam vets, Afghanistan and Iraq veterans, as well as their families.  Things are finally happening breaking the silence of PTSD.  I have never seen it this bad, but I have never had so much hope as I do today.  The silence is ending.  The stigma will be defeated.